my new passion - painting.... comments plzzzz

funny stuff... don mind it... jus for fun....

This is

..................Ultimate.... ..............


...I bet u can't stop laughing after reading this.


These are Girls profiles taken from SOME MATRIMONIAL SITE. Grammar and spelling errors have no place in a profile descripttion as everything is straight from the heart!

SO LET's HAVE A GR8 FUN


~ : Disclaimer : ~

I am not responsible if you forget your basic grammar after reading this mail...


- Hello To Viewers My Name is Sowmya , I am single i dont have male,If any one whant to marrie to me u can visite to my home. I am not a good education but i working all field in bangalore .. if u like me u welcome to my heart...

when ever u whant to meet pls visit my resident or

send u letter..

Thanks

yours Regards Sowmya ~*~



i want very simple boy. from brahmin educated family from Orissa state she is also know about RAMAYAN, GEETA BHAGABATA, and other homework

(Wut Homework?)



I am a happy-go-lucky kind of person. Enjoys every moments of life. I love to make friendship. Becauese friendship is a

first step of love. I am looking for my dreamboy who will love me more than i.

Because i love myself a lot. If u think that is u then why to late come on ........hold my hand forever !!!

(The dilwale dulhaniya effect)



i am simple girl. I have lot of problemin my life because of my lucknow i am looking one boy he care me

and love me lot lot lot

(I don't know why but this is one of my favorites)



i want a boy with no drinks if he wants he can wear jeans in house but while steping out of house he should give recpect to our cast

(by not wearing his jeans? Wat the hell...)


HYE I AM A GOOD LOKING GIRL,WHO HAS THE CAPABILITY TO MAKE ANY BODY TO LOUGH.I BELIEVE IN GOD AND ACCORDING TO ME FRIENDS ARE THE REAL MESSENGER OF GOD. THE 3 THINGS I AM LOOKING FROM A BOY

,THEY ARE

1.THEY MUST BELIEVE IN GOD.

2. THEY HAVE TO LIKE MY PROFFESION

3. THEY SHOULD NOT GET BORED WITH ME WHEN I WILL TRY

TO MAKE THEM LOUGH.

(all of us are loughing {laughing})



whatever he may be but he should feel that he is going to be someone groom and he must think of the future life if he is toolike this he would be called the man of the lamp

(I am clueless, I feel so lost. Can anyone tell me what this girl wants)



i love my patner i marriage the patner ok i search my patner and I love the patner ok thik hai the patner has a graduate

ok

(I am again clueless but I liked the use of "ok". The person is suffering from "Ok-syndrome")



iam pranati my family histoy my two brother two sister and father & mother sister completely married

(somebody please explain in comments section how to get married 'completely' ?)



my name is farhanbegum and i am unmarried. pleaes you marrige me pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes

(height of desperation! J )



iam kanandevi. i do owo businas.one sistar.he was marred.

(No comments)



hello i am a good charactarised woman. i want to run my life happily. i divorced my first husband. his charactor is not good'.
i expect the good minded and clean habits boy who may be in the same caste or other caste accepted ...

(but credit cards not accepted..?? ?)



Iam Sharmila my colour is black, but my heart is white. i like social service.

(Zebra..???)


? SOUND GOOD NA ?

Doctor and a Bee

A man comes running to the doctor shouting &

screaming
...In pain "Please doctor you've got to help me.

I've been stung by a
Bee."

DOCTOR: "Don't worry; I'll put some cream on it."


MAN: "You will never find that bee. It must be

miles
Away by now."


DOCTOR: "No you don't understand! I'll put some

cream
On the place you were stung."


MAN: "Oh! It happened in the garden where I was
Sitting under a tree"


DOCTOR (in anger): "No, no you IDIOT! I mean on

which
Part of your body did that bee sting."


MAN (still screaming in pain): "On my finger! The

bee
Stung me on my finger and it really hurts"


DOCTOR (banging his fist, abusing and shouting):
"Which one?"


MAN (innocently ): "How may I to know? All bees

looks Same to me." :P :DSee More

hmmmmmm

Arz Kiya Hai !

Zindagi Ne Diye Hain Bare Dhoke

.
....
.
.
.
Zindagi Ne Diye Hain Bare Dhoke
.
.
.
.
.
.
But Its Ok Its Ok :D

FACTS : aajkal ki gals.....

Boy : What Is Ur Name
Girl : Q Bataon, Me Tumhein Nahi Janti
Boy: Na Batao Me Konsa Tumhen Apni New
HONDA Car Main Bitha K
5 Star Resturant Le Jane Wala Tha
...Girl: Nida, B.Com Final Year, Punjab College
College Timing 8am To 1pm,
Friday Timing 8 To 12pm
Sunday Off
Aati Abu K Sath Hun
Wapsi Pe Akeli Hoti Hon











Define a True Lover?

A Girl singing in a Bathroom
While Taking Bath
and
...a Boy Near the Keyhole
is Using His Ears Not His Eyes.See More







COME LIKE A HORSE
.
.
.
.
...
SIT LIKE A THIEF
.
.
.
.

AND GO LIKE KING…
.
.
.
.

This slogan was written on a TOILET DOOR :D









Crispy Fact !!

Call a girl pretty & She will remember it for 5 minutes..

Call a girl ugly & She will remember it forever :P :D







F A C T . . . ! ! !

Guys Get Mad Easily
Girls Get Sad Easily

...Guys Can Forget,
But Cannot Forgive
Girls Can Forgive,
But Cannot Forget

Guys Care The Most About
The Quantity of Love
Girls Care The Most About
The Quality of Love

Guys Break-Up When
They Feel Love From Another
Girl
Girls Break-Up When
They Feel The Feeling of
Separation From Her Man . . .
Good morning Youngistaan








There Are Two Choices
In Life:

Stay Single And Be Miserable

...0r

Get Married And Wish You
Were Dead. . .:P








The Most Embarrassing situation in a Boy's life :-
.?
.?
.?
.?
....?
When his Female Friend calls him in the Morning & his Mother picks-up the call
and
says:- "beta.... Wo to Latrine gaya hua hai ...........!!!!!!!!!!!!










!!.. For Husbands ...!!
How To Start Ur Day
Wid A Positive Outlook

Open A New File In Your PC & Name It As "Wife"
...
Send It To The RECYCLE BIN.

Empty The RECYCLE BIN.

Your PC Will Ask You,

"Are You Sure You Want To Delete Wife
Permanently?"

Answer Calmly, 'Yes' And Press The Mouse Button Firmly

U'l Feel Better For Sure :D








The most romantic lines:
Main kho gaya hu tumhare pyaar me tum bhi kho jao..

If translated in English it becomes:
“I am lost in ur love, u also GET LOST” :D










Millions Of People

Wrote Love Letters

But
...
Everyone Sends

The First Love Letter

To Me

Just Imagine

How Handsome I am

Quoted By Dustbin :D












How To Convert
A Most Interesting Song
0f Yours As A Damn
IRRITATING Song ? ? ?
.
....
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Just Set It As You
"ALARM" Tone. . . . =P =DSee More

DID YOU KNOW:

"I t
I s
F a c e - b o o k
...T h a t
M a d e
M e
R e a l i z e
T h a t
I
'L i k e'
S o
M a n y
T h i n g s . . . " ;)




Not even 2012, Paranormal Activity, shooting, bomb attacks, or failing a class is more terrifying than seeing 5 missed calls from mom. :/ :P





After reading this
sentence
You will realize that
the the brain doesn’t recognize
a second ‘the’.
...Now you read it to
see if that's true . . . ;)
Good morning Youngistaan :)





DID YOU KNOW:
-Kissing is healthy.
-Bananas are good for cramps.
-Chicken soup actually makes you feel better.
-Its true. Guys DO insult you if they like you.
...-89% of guys would want girls to make the first move.
-Girls love it when Guys hug them from behind the waist.
-Chocolate makes you feel better.
-Girls love it when guys let them wear their hoodie or jacket.
-Guys think its cute when you mess up.









CLASSIC INSULT :

AIEEE results were declared,

A boy messaged his rank to his Galfrnd....
...
She replied, "Naya no. liya hai kya ?"
:)






Things in boys room before marriage
Perfumes,
Love letters,
Gifts,
Friendship Bands,
...Cards &
Nokia N8

After Marriage
Painkillers,
Loan papers,
Unpaid bills &
Nokia 1100 :P :D

hahaha

Beti- Me padosi se pyar karti hu aur mein uske sath bhag rahi hu,
Baap- Thanku mere paise aur time dono bach gaye,
Beti- Main letter padh rahi hun jo mummy chor ke gayi hai..! :o :P

hahaha

Beti- Me padosi se pyar karti hu aur mein uske sath bhag rahi hu,
Baap- Thanku mere paise aur time dono bach gaye,
Beti- Main letter padh rahi hun jo mummy chor ke gayi hai..! :o :P

English And Hindi Always Contradict

The Sooner The Better.
Jaldi Ka Kaam Shetan Ka Hota Hai.
...
Talk Of The Devil And The Devil Is Here.
Bari Lambi Umer Hai, Abhi Tumhari Baat
Kar Rahay Thay.

Absence Makes A Heart Go Fonder.
Nazar Se Ojhal, Dil Se Ojhal.

Fight Your Rights.
Sabar Ka Phal Meetha Hota Hai.

As Wise As An Owl.
Ullo Ka Phata. :D

Aulaad hai tu meri... :(

Kid 2 mom- mumma! Main paida kaise hua?
Mom- maine ek vessel me mitti daal k rakh di aur kuch dino baad dekha to tum paida ho gaye the.
Kid did d same thing...
After a few days he saw a frog in d vessel...
Kid got angry- jee toh karta hai tujhe jaan se maar du, par kya karu? Aulaad hai tu meri... :(

‎31 Ways To Make a Girl Smile (:

1. Tell her she is BEAUTIFUL..

2. Hold her hand at any moment even if its just for a second..
...
3. HUG HER FROM BEHIND!!!!!

4. Leave her voice messages to wake up to..

5. Wrestle with her :D

6. don’t go hang out with you ex when shes not with you, you might not relize how badly it hurts her..

7. If youre talking to another girl, when you’re done talking, walk over and hug her and kiss her….let her know she’s yours and they aren’t.

8. Write her notes or call her just to say “hi”..

9. Introduce her to your friends . . . as your girlfriend..

10. Play with her hair..

11. Pick her up (she loves it)..

12. Get upset if another guy touches her and she doesn’t like it..

13. Make her laugh..

14. Let her fall asleep in your arms..

15. If she’s mad at you, kiss her..

16. If you care about her, then TELL HER(don’t be afraid to)

17. Every guy should give their girl 3 things: a stuffed animal(she’ll hug it every time she goes to sleep),
jewelry (she’ll treasure it forever), and one of his t-shirts (she’ll most likely wear it to bed) or sweatshirts sprayed with
his cologne!! and flowers or something occasionally..

18. Treat her the same around your friends as you do when you’re alone..

19. Look her in the eyes and smile..

20. Hang out with her on weekends..

21.Kiss her in the rain (girls love this)

22.Kiss her just for the hell of it..

23. If your listening to music, let her listen too. =)

24. Remember her birthday and get her something,even if its simple and inexpensive, it came from YOU. it means ALL the world to her.

25. when she gives you a present on your birthday, Christmas, or just whenever, take it and tell her you love it, even if you don’t (it’ll make her happy)

26. Always call her when you say you will, it may not seem like it, but it does hurt her and makes her think you don’t care so call even if you can only talk for a minute. Girls don’t necessarily have to have hour long conversations every night but its nice for us to hear your voice even for a quick hello..

27. Give her what she wants..

28. Recognize the small things . . . they usually mean the
most..

29.DONT hug her friends or your friends that are
girls cause she’ll feel left out..

30.hang out with her whenever you are free and u should be free to hang wit your girl friend all the time..

31.If u care about her…SHOW her!(totally)

BACHELOR OF FLIRTISM on Air..! :D

Trin Trin...

Gal: Hello Baby...
......Boy: Ohh, Jaan Bolo..

Gal:
Kahan ho Yaar ?
Subah se koi Ata Pata hi Nhi hai Tumhara..!!

Boy:
Arey Hum to Khoye huwe hain Aapki Aankho me..
Gal:
Abhi kya kar Rahe ho???

Boy:
Tumhari hi Pic Dekh raha hun,
Kahin Aur Mann Lag hi Nahi raha.

Gal:
Maine to Tumhe Apni Pic di hi nahi..!

Boy:
Arey Tumhari Pic to Barson se;
Mere Dil mein Chapi hui hai..!

Gal:
Lekin Hum to Parson hi Mile hain na ?? !!

Boy:
Tumhare Bina Ek Pal bhi;
Barson ke Samaan hai Pinky...

Gal:
Pinky..??? Ye Pinky kaun hai??
Main to Divya hun..!!

Boy:
Dekha Tumse Baat karte hi
Sab kuch Bhool Jata hun..!

Gal:
Tum Sunny hi ho Na???

Boy:
Ghar Waale to Arjun kehte hain,
But Wo Galat ho Sakte hain.. Tum Nahi..

Gal:
Ye '805843251' Ye Tumhara hi No. hai na???

Boy:
Tha to Nahi but ab se hai..!! :P :D